Saw

Over a month ago, when I was driving on the truck, Bubba the Love Sponge was conducting an interview with the owner of the Tampa Bay Lightning was on and the two of them were talking about the newest Saw movie that was being released in the theater. As they were talking about the Saw franchise, I became interested in the first movie.

This movie was great! Having never heard anything about this movie, I didn't know what to expect. While I would not consider this a horror, mainly because it didn't scare me at all, it did keep me on the edge of my seat. This movie had a lot of twists and turns they kept me wondering who the real puppet master was. While I won't give away the ending, I will say that it gave me a 'Sixth Sense' feel to it. What I mean is that after you see the ending of Sixth Sense, it would be cool to sit through it again to see how Jigsaw became the evil puppet master.

Ghostbusters 2

After watching Transformers and giving the girls a bath, both girls were wired! I figured that we could try to mix in on more movie, perhaps helping putting both girls to sleep. We picked out Ghostbusters 2 from my movie case and began watching it.

Was this movie as good as the first one, not even close. But lets face it, most sequels pale in comparison to the originals. Having said that, I did like Ghostbusters 2! I liked how Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, and Harold Ramis "put the band back together" (stole that from a Blues Brothers reference) and put together a good film. I loved how it started five years after the first one and the Ghostbuster were disbanded due to the actions from the first one. It gave the movie something to look forward to. After they get back together and start capturing ghost again, the movie starts to follow the same formula that the first one had. Everything is going fine with the Ghostbusters, and then they get arrested. Then after the city almost crumbles, the mayor releases the Ghostbusters out to stop the madness. Rick Moranis adds some comic relief, a little more than he did in the first one.

All in all, Ghostbusters 2 is a nice little sequel! I just hope that Ghostbusters 3 is worth it!

Transformers: The Movie (1984)

In Dakota's pick for movie night tonight was the original cartoon movie, Transformers: The Movie. While Transformers has returned to the big screen with live action movies, it's cool to take a step back and look at what started it all.

First off, the movie is what it is, an hour and a half version of the cartoon show, with a twist. We see the death of Optimus Prime, the transformation of Megatron into Galvatron, and the new era of Transformers, which was later explored in the cartoon shows. Second, I liked the voices that were used for the newer characters. Judd Nelson voiced Hot Rod, the eventual chosen one for the Autobots, and Leonard Nimoy (the original Mr. Spock) voiced the power driven Galvatron. With Orsen Welles voicing the planet eating robot, Unicron (which, before his death, stated that he hated the film), Finally, I loved the soundtrack to the film. Stan Bush's songs "Dare" and "You Got the Touch" really added the punch this movie needed.

Transformers: The Movie is a quality cartoon flick that fans of the cartoon will enjoy. While the newer generation will not understand how cutting edge this movie was, the older generation can watch it and remember where they were when the show would come on every day after school. I know I did!

Ponyo

A few days ago, I asked Dakota and Cadence to see if they could find my PSP. I had misplaced it after I came home from being fired, and I wanted to get my Madden Football on! Dakota found the PSP, so I promised her that I would allow her to choose anything (with the exception of going to Going Bonkers) she wanted to do on Saturday. After a few days of thinking about it, and perhaps some pushing from Melissa, Dakota chose seeing Ponyo.

This movie sucks! Maybe it's me, but I just don't like Japanamation! The story is good for little kids, but here in the Hannah Montana generation, it doesn't rank. Let me see if I can make some sense out of this madness! A fish with a human face breaks free from a school and is found by a little boy, stuck in a jar. The boy saves the fish and places it into a bucket. From there, the fish begins to show affection for the boy, even going so far to tell the boy that it loves him. All of sudden, the fish grows feet and arms and is offically a little girl, with powers to make objects bigger (sounds like a porno). Then Ponyo (the newly named little girl/fish) begins to fall asleep at every moment they turn around. My guess, Ponyo was bored with the story too! As the movie moves along, Ponyo and the little boy must show their love toward one another (nevermind that this kid might be in kindergarden) in order for Ponyo to remain a human. While I won't give away the story, I will tell you this: at least Ponyo got a few z's in this one, I was fighting with Dakota to cut me a break!

While I can't get the last two hours of my life back, I can say with a clear conscience that I hope I never come across this movie again! I know that Dakota liked it, and to most fathers, that's the only thing that should matter. While she gave it a four star review to me in the car, I can honestly tell her that it's between a one and a two star movie for me, and quite frankly, that's being nice to her. For me, I'd rather sit through Hannah Montana again!

RV

While sitting in my chair (because I'm too damn lazy to get my ass up), we were flipping through the channels and came across the end of The Wizard of Oz. While I would love to pick apart that movie, the movie that followed was RV with Robin Williams. I remember sitting through the movie over a year ago, but like Crash, I had no recollection of the movie. After watching it again, I remember a few moments of the movie, but all in all, it was like watching it for the first time. The movie is cute, but not one of Robin Williams best movies. It is a simple comedy of a husband and father who is forced to cancel a luxury vacation in Hawaii with his family because of his business. So in order to solve this dilemma, he rents an RV and attempts to spend quality time with his family, Griswold style! And just like the Griswolds, everything goes wrong on the trip. There are some funny moments in the movie, but all in all, if you seen Robin Williams act, you'll sit there and say, "I've seen this before!" It's a nice family film and that's all I can really say about this film.

Gran Torino

After listening to all of the hype that surrounded this movie, and people saying that this is Clint Eastwood's best movie, I had to give this movie a shot. Let me first say, I have seen better Eastwood movies before, Heartbreak Ridge, In the Line of Fire, and Space Cowboys come to mind. However, this movie is good. I liked how in the begiinning of this movie, you hated Eastwood's character. He is stand offish, rude, and set in his ways. By the time the movie ends, you end pulling for him for sticking up for his neighbors, who, ironically, he treats better than his own family. While Clint Eastwood is getting older and older as time flys by, he is still credible as an action star and director, for that matter. I loved the way he shot the film. Sometimes he would shot the film as an overhead shot, and other times, he filmed it as an over the shoulder shot. My only problem with the movie was the title. While I get that the car itself was the main principle of what his neighbor tried to steal, thus having him help Climt out around the house, the car was a minor character. Only until the end does the car get mentioned again! Other than that, there isn't a lot of bad things to say about Gran Torino. Even if you don't like Clint Eastwood, you should like this movie!

Only You

While browsing through Netflix, we saw that Only You was available online. Having never seen the movie, and after loving Robert Downey Jr. in Iron Man, I gave it a try. This was a sweet, romantic movie about a woman who believes in fate and flys half way around the world to meet the man she's supposed to marry. Of course, when she gets there, she finds out that fate has other plans! Marisa Tomei is great in the movie as a woman who loves to be swept off her feet. Bonnie Hunt, who always plays the wife or sister, is Marisa's sister-in law who goes with her to Italy to find Mr. Right! As for Robert Downey Jr., all I can say is....wow! What gets me is that during this time period, Robert Downey Jr. was spiraling out of control with drugs. To see him turn in a performance like this only tells you how great of an actor he is. If you haven't see this, give it a shot!

Paul Blart: Mall Cop

While getting ready to enter back into the world of security, my family and I sat in front of the lap top and watched Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Kevin James is great in this movie as he plays the under appreciated security guard at a mall. As I kept watching this movie, I noticed that Kevin James has a lot of John Candy in him, which is a great thing. The sweetness that John Candy gave you in movies like Planes, Trains, and Automoblies, The Great Oudoors, and Uncle Buck come through in Kevin James. As far as a Sandler production, this movie didn't stack up with Big Daddy, Mr. Deeds, and Anger Management. As far as a Kevin James movie, the movie was pretty good! It's a good movie to watch with you kids, they'll love it!

Dance Flick

As much as I liked this movie, the rating of PG-13 really bothered me. In this movie, we see a guy relieve himself while dancing and a woman's vagina perform a beat-box. While it is funny, I don't think kids who are 13 should be ready for this. I say this knowing that my 6 year old and 4 year old watched it, but we went into this movie thinking that the humor wouldn't be that crude. As far as the story, it picks apart Save the Last Dance as well as a few other movies. The Wayan's brothers are genius' when it comes to movies like this, and I thought Damon Wayan's Jr, was a spitting image of his dad. If you want a good laugh with no kids around, watch this movie!

Crash (2004)

I remember watching this movie, shortly after it won best picture in 2004. As much as I enjoyed it then, I had a hard time remembering the chain of events in this movie before I rewatched it a few nights ago. While I don't remember the other movies that were nominated that year, which the exception of Brokeback Mountain, I do remember thinking that this movie was probably the best movie of that year. After watching it again a few nights ago, I still agree with that thought! This movie was great! I loved the story about the locksmith who tells his daughter about an invisible scarf that protects him from being shot and how that nearly played itself out in the movie with his daughter. I liked Don Cheadle's part of the story, and Trevor Howard is very underrated as an actor. I thought Matt Dillion did a great job of a cop who is tired of living in the polictical world of affirmative action. All in all, a must see!

American Pie: Beta House

A few nights ago, I thought I saw the worst movie ever made, American Pie: The Naked Mile. Boy was I wrong! As bad as that movie was, it's sequel, American Pie: Beta House would be worse. Just like The Naked Mile, the only funny part of the movie was in the beginning of the film. Throughout the rest of the movie, you will fight like hell to find another laugh. Once again, Eugene Levy appears in this film, but even he can't save this film. Stay away from the this film, hopefully the madness of lesser American Pies can stop!

G-Force

Let me tell you about the greatness of the dollar theater. Melissa and I took Dakota and Cadence to the movie theater to go see G-Force. On 50 cent Tuesday, we paid $2 to get in, and almost $6 for the popcorn. How often can you take a family of four out to see a movie for almost $8? Granted we brought our own drinks and candy, but that's beside the point! Of course, when going to see a Disney film, you get stuck with the kid previews before the movie. Just once, I'd like to see a trailer for Saw 16 right before Cinderella. Anyway, as we all got settled in, the movie began.

I really wanted to pan this movie! I thought I'd be bored with it, and that I would be rolling my eyes for every cheesy one-liner. Instead, I actually enjoyed the movie. Granted guinea pigs were top secret agents, and that alone would be enough for me to pass judgement on the movie, the story was pretty good! Both kids really enjoyed the movie, and in all honesty, that's who should love this movie, your kids! If you're a parent with kids and you need to get out of the house, go see this movie. While you at it, take advantage of the dollar theater, it will be worth it!

Halloween (2007)

A few months back, I was in my truck, listening to the Stern show. His guest was heavy metal singer turned director Rob Zombie and his wife. They were promoting the sequel to the reboot of the classic horror movie, Halloween. Having never seen the original Halloween movie, I really had no interest seeing the newest version. However, as Rob Zombie was going into detail with Stern about his vision of the series, I became more intrigued. After watching the reboot of Friday the 13th, I was a little skeptical/ Two nights after Halloween, Netflix sends us the first Halloween movie of the Rob Zombie series.

This movie was great! Having never known the origin of Michael Myers, it was interesting to see how tormented he was as a child. With his stepfather being an out of work loser and his mother working as a stripper, he was in white-trash hell! It didn't help that he was picked on in school, and his older sister could care less about his needs. I also liked how they explained why he hid in masks. When the janitor tells him to live inside his own head, he takes it to heart and creates all sorts of masks. I thought Malcolm McDowell was excellent as the child psychiatrist who tries to treat Michael Myers.

Melissa mentioned this to me and I'm starting to agree. The art of horror movies isn't about the movie being scary anymore. I don't know if it's because the directors can't get the audience to jump, or that we've seen real scary moments in our lives that scary music and an unpredible death just isn't enough for us. Either way, I loved the story. I can't wait to see the sequel, even though I already glanced at the plot on wikipedia.org.

American Pie: The Naked Mile

I remember this one time, in American Pie, when Jason Biggs' character heard that the inside of a women was as warm as sweet apple pie. So Jason's character, Jim, took it upon himself to have sex with an actual apple pie, to only be caught by his father. I remember this one time, in American Pie 2, when Jim, Stifler, and Finch were in some lesbians apartment and were forced to play a truth or dare game with the girls, granted it was more dare than truth. I remember this one time, in American Wedding, when Jim shaved his pubic hair and tried to throw it out the window, to only go all over his wedding cake and future in-laws. I remember this one time, before the American Pie franchise started, when no one heard of Sean William Scott and Eugene Levy was just a bit player in Steve Martin movies. Case in point, the American Pie franchise gave us many laughs over the last ten years. Then came the spin off years.

I don't really remember much about AP: Boot Camp. I never saw AP: Beta House. With the beauty of Netflix, we got to see AP; The Naked Mile. Let me just say this, it's time to close this franchise up. After the first five minutes of the movie, the funny moments were few and far between. My biggest problem with this movie was that they would keep with a scene about five minutes too long. The midget football game was a funny sight gag, but ten minutes of it was too much. Correct me if I'm wrong, but was Steve Stifler (Sean William Scott) a master cocksman in high school. If I remember correctly, he was the one who could throw the parties where OTHER people got laid, not him. Since when did the Stifler name meant that girls would fall all over you.

Imagine watching Lethal Weapon without Mel Gibson and Danny Glover. Imagine watching the Ocean 11 movies without Clooney, Pitt, and company. Imagine going to see a superhero movie and not ever seeing the superhero. That's what this movie is, the American Pie name, no substance to follow.